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für dich - eine antwort

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Secret letter to what pounds in your chest.

"I'm honestly wondering, where my self-esteem has gone too. Sometimes I'm really feeling that it's making me crazy,
not feeling any confident about my own decisions, nor while I'm making my own decisions - and you and your doubtful words aren't making it any better. It's not that I feel the need to step on you or your opinions - it's just the fact, that it's kind of stopping me from developing my self-esteem and confidence new, when you're criticizing me and my actions all the time.

Maybe I make false decisions, maybe you get something, I don't get, but this isn't the point here.
I'm done with beeing made fun of, criticized, missed, patronized, not be taken seriously
, and even this is not your fault, neither it's mine, and I came a lot of years ago to the point where I couldn't take it anymore, but had no way to get out of this, and now I'm fucking done with this shit. Simply stated: This will take me down, if you don't stop directly.
Although I'm in awe of your intentions and your intentions seem to be good, this is not what I need.
What I need is your respect, the beautiful, lovely heart, which pounds in your chest, and most of all your support, 'cause there are still enough demons left to wrestle for me. And I am sorry, that this affects you so much, but can't you see - that's why I need your support, not your doubts, opinions, critic, whatever.
If you want me to be a part of you and your life, if you want me to compromise, do what I ask you to do, to make me feel comfortable in my own skin. The demons, and all the rest of it, is what I have to do. But it's way more easier when I feel, that you have faith in me."

2.9.13 01:50
Letzte Einträge: Pense à toi - Ich denk an dich


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